Recently, I hit a pretty rough patch. I was surfing the edge of a burnout. I am sharing my story of a woman leader, solopreneur and mother who also goes through stages of reinvention to meet new challenges and change. Read on to feel seen and learn from my experience.

Returning to a part-time corporate job in a massive transformation and cynical environment, with two small children, navigating building up a solopreneurship coaching business and all the self-made impatience and pressure that comes along with it. 2 Jobs, 2 Babes. I was also supporting my husband and building up his business.

Objectively I had a lot going on.

I’ve learned through massive change in my past that

We need to keep an eye on our big goals
We need to recognize and interrupt the inner critic narrative and shift to an empowering perspective and actions
Get support from a guide along the way
Practice extreme self-care

Still I hit a wall. Even experts on coaching and leadership are not perfect or immune.

I’ve had this before returning from my first maternity leave, after 4 short months. With a new child comes a lot of fulfillment, leadership learnings from adventures in parenting and still when I came back to work I forgot what I knew and again had to reevaluate lifestyle choices to manage my focus, my memory and energy.

Last year with my second child it happened again. I got very frustrated with myself this time. All of this coach training. My experience and learnings from my first child. And still, this looks like it’s going to be an epic crash.

And guess what it wasn’t.

It was terrifying to admit that my tank was empty a few months after my return and I did not yet have all the answers about how to refill it. At first I thought I would lose all credibility. I recognized the narrative of my inner critic and not the absolute truth.

Then I reminded myself I have overcome so much change and challenge in my life before – divorce and remarriage, massive health challenges, international career moves and associated leadership challenges. I have an inner strength and wisdom to get me through this.

I recognized the signs that I needed help resetting my energy and taking care of my mental well-being. In a short amount of time I got clarity on what really matters. With help from my coaches, I asked myself these key questions:

What activities will give me the highest sense of satisfaction, working and living towards my values, and taking care of my mental well-being and happiness?
What are the real 20% of activities where the risks are worthy of wise vigilance? Where there is a real risk to wellbeing? What 80% all other things where even if something went wrong, me and those I care for would be just fine and I could convert a “bad outcome into a gift or learning, strength or inspiration?
Who will I connect and collaborate with that will really move things forward – my coalition of the willing – and fill my cup?

I go forward with clear new goals and insights, first steps to achieve them and at the same time experience gratitude and wellbeing along the journey. I have remembered what I knew, have more energy and better concentration and a ton more resilience.

The inner journey I’ve been on the last 10 years made it possible to bounce back so quickly this time. I’m grateful for the coaches, manager coaches, my husband, kids, colleagues and all that played a part to support. I realize there will be further peaks and valleys of life. To sustainably balance, impact and wellbeing throughout them is an ongoing intentional practice of conscious choices.

I’ve gathered new methods along the way that I am very inspired to share with women and parent leaders that are carrying so much and deeply desire that sweet spot of balancing impact in the world at large, well-being and fulfilling relationships in their private life.

Now, with some distance from the situation, I understand the saying “your mess becomes your message”. If the story resonates with you, I would love to hear about your experience, share your inspiration with me on this topic. Let’s talk.

I’m holding out an open hand. I have rediscovered the space where impact and well-being come together. I will meet you there.